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Remus Lupin ([info]tothelast) wrote,
@ 2008-01-08 15:57:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
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Your Character
Name:
Remus John Lupin
Nominal Significance: The literal meaning of “Remus” is unknown, but, in Roman mythology, Remus was one of two twins who founded the city of Rome. He and his brother, Romulus, were the children of the war god, Mars by Rhea Silvia, a priestess and Vestal virgin in the Italian city of Alba Longa; their royal lineage went back to Aeneas, Trojan prince and son of the love goddess, Venus. The twins were taken to be killed at birth but, instead, were left to die on the bank of the Tiber rive; there, they were adopted and suckled by a she-wolf, and, from thence, they were adopted by a farmer, Faustulus. Eventually, Romulus slew Remus for pointing out the flaws in the city’s defense system. “John” comes from the Greek name Ionnaes, derived from the Hebrew name Yochanan, meaning “Yahweh is gracious.” And Lupin is the family name, derived from the Latin Lupus, meaning “wolf.”
Nicknames: Moony, courtesy of two of his childhood best friends, James Potter and Sirius Black, and encouraged by the fourth of their number, Peter Pettigrew. It eventually got to the point that his fellow Marauders used the nickname ‘Moony’ more often than ‘Remus’ to refer to him and several of their classmates picked up on it too. Although the name was actually derived from Remus’ condition and what the moon does to him, they fostered the rumor that it came from his bookish nature and distractibility. And Peeves has called him ‘loony, loony Lupin’ at more than one juncture, but let’s just not talk about Peeves.

Birthday: March 10th, 1960
Age: 40
Sign: Pisces
Former House: Gryffindor, class of 1978
Wand: Thirteen inches of incredibly flexible holly, cored with three unicorn tail hairs. Very good for charms and defense work.
Bloodline: Halfblood – his father was of mixed blood and his mother was Muggleborn. Additionally, Remus was bitten by Fenrir Greyback as a small boy and is a full-fledged werewolf.
Patronus: Remus’s Patronus has always taken the form of an antelope. Traditionally, the antelope has lunar associations, rather like the werewolf, but, more importantly, the antelope is supposedly a diplomat. Antelopes are commonly seen as symbols of a person who loves harmony, will not assail his enemies rashly, and will stand his ground but would not risk hurting someone – all traits that Remus possesses. Additionally, the antelope is associated with innocence and generosity, traits that Remus prizes in other people, but won’t acknowledge in himself.
Boggart: The full moon. As a werewolf, Remus completely loses control of himself and memory of whom he is when faced with the real full moon. Since his first transformation, he’s been utterly terrified of both the transformation itself – seeing as its painful and reduces him to a state he’d rather never have to experience and wouldn’t wish on his worst enemies – and, more importantly, what it means for him. Transforming means that he becomes something other than Remus Lupin, something he can’t control even though he wishes he could. Control is the operative word with Remus; one of his fatal flaws is that he tries too hard to control uncontrollable things and, when that fails, he turns to controlling himself instead. And he’d rather not think of what would happen when he loses control of himself; all the conclusions he’s come to have been bad ones.
Mirror of Erised: An end to the war; Harry, Ron, and Hermione happy; the Weasley family completely restored (meaning, Charlie alive again and Percy back together with the rest of them); Sirius, James, and Lily, while not restored to life, having a peaceful and happy afterlife; Peter returned from the Dark Side; Fenrir Greyback dead; and, at the center of it all, himself, no longer a werewolf, hand-in-hand with Tonks.

OWLs: Charms: O
Transfiguration: O
Potions: T
Defense Against the Dark Arts: O
Astronomy: E
History of Magic: P
Herbology: E
Ancient Runes: O
Arithmancy: O
Divination: D
Care of Magical Creatures: E

NEWTs: Charms: O
Transfiguration: O
Defense Against the Dark Arts: O
Herbology: E
Ancient Runes: O
Arithmancy: O
Care of Magical Creatures: E

Political View: Well, first thing’s first: as a Halfblood, Remus is very much against Lord Voldemort, the Death Eaters, and all their Pureblood supremacy rubbish. Furthermore, he has more than a passing grudge against the Ministry for various reasons, including, but not limited to: passing laws that encourage the societal prejudice against werewolves, generally treating him and the other werewolves as second-class citizens, the entirety of what happened to Sirius, the various instances of encroaching on Dumbledore and/or McGonagall’s ability to run Hogwarts however they saw fit, and Dolores Jane Umbridge. More to the point, though, Remus is very firmly allied with the Order of the Phoenix. He’s been a member since the First War with Voldemort, and remains on as an assistant leader and spy/liaison to the werewolves; either way, he’s quite an active member of the Order, though he’d do more recruiting if he weren’t so sure that he’d be met with resistance and/or discrimination.

Sexuality: Honestly, Remus is more pansexual than gay, straight, or bi. Physical intimacy, while a very nice bonus to a relationship, isn’t on top of his list of priorities. More than anything, Remus wants love and companionship, someone he can trust completely and who honestly won’t abandon him, and, though he only discovered this aspect of what he wants recently, someone he can care for without having to take care of. Having faced nigh-unbelievable prejudice in his life for being a werewolf, Remus understands the value of keeping an open mind and certainly does so when it comes to his relationships. Should he end up with a woman, he’ll be happy; should he end up with a man, he’ll still be happy. It’s, ultimately, the person that matters, more than what’s attached to them… though it should be noted, for the sake of humor, that Remus has quite a thing for Blacks. Sirius, Tonks, Andromeda… he never fancied Bellatrix or Narcissa, but Sirius, Tonks, and Andromeda were definitely on his radar. He had a crush on Andromeda for most of his third year, based on a photograph that Sirius had. His relationship with Sirius was often tumultuous and, somehow or other, survived the First War, Azkaban, and Sirius’s various self-destructive tendencies. And, as for Tonks… well. There’s quite a lot to say about Tonks.

And, at some point, he would really like to have and raise kids with someone. He just thinks that it’s never, ever going to happen.

Appearance: TO COME!
PB: Jim Carrey
Photos:

Personality: Remus is, in a word, complex – moreso than the average bear, even though he doesn’t particularly think so. At his core, he’s little more than a nice, sweet man who’s been more that his fair share of hardship, but keeps his head up and takes his greatest joys from teaching and making other people happy. When you first meet him, he comes off as just a nice, quiet, respectful man who appreciates the simple pleasures in life; this isn’t exactly untrue at all, but it doesn’t get all of who he is. Because of the discrimination he’s faced as a werewolf, he more than knows how it feels to be an outcast, and he doesn’t want anything to even go through vaguely similar things, let alone the same thing. Remus wouldn’t wish lycanthropy on his worst enemies, let alone someone he doesn’t know or cares very deeply for. Merlin knows, feeling as though society rejects you, everything that you are, and everything about you for reasons that you can’t control can make someone mad, vindictive, wrathful, and all manner of other things; Remus tries his best to deal with his own impulses productively, and, if he learns that someone else is having them, to quench said fires.

Remus is very much a people person, despite his introverted nature. He fully admits to having co-dependent tendencies, and to taking too much pleasure from being liked, but these behaviour patterns are so deeply ingrained in his psyche at this point that changing is unlikely. Again, because of the discrimination and bigotry he’s had to deal with, Remus has a great fear of being disliked before someone even gets to know him. As such, he doesn’t take the friendships and positive relationships he has lightly. As Lily and the Marauders all knew well, Remus would stand up to his friends if he really disagreed with something they were doing (examples include: Sirius’s prank on Snape in their sixth year, Molly Weasley’s attempts at matchmaking, and Peter’s switching to the Dark Side), but, generally speaking, he’ll go along with pretty much anything. He worries nigh on constantly about whether or not his loved ones are happy and, if he gets even the slightest inkling that they aren’t, he goes out of his way to make sure that they get happy.

All that said, Remus does have some issues with trusting people. His fear of being hated for being a werewolf keeps him from being very socially active, and, after various incidents he’s dealt with, he can never be sure whether or not to trust someone. The one exception to this is that, if Dumbledore trusted a person, then Remus will implicitly trust him or her; this even extends to Snape and Draco. After the Death Eater attack and Dumbledore’s murder in 1997, Remus went through a period of being very bitter at Snape and Draco – after all, Snape killed his mentor and second father, the only man who would’ve let Remus come to school at all, let alone return to teach children, and Draco plotted to do the same – but his sympathies won him out at the end. For one thing, Remus comes very close to considering himself to be in Dumbledore’s life-debt for everything that the man did for him, and, as such, swears complete, utter, unwavering loyalty to the man’s memory and policies. The Order is, in several ways, Remus’s life, and he figures that it wouldn’t make Dumbledore happy for anyone in the Order to bring enmity between them and Draco for what happened. Draco was just trying to save his family, after all, and, as for Snape, his loyalties may be with the Order, the Death Eaters, or just himself, but Dumbledore trusted him, and so Remus will. The other side of this is that, with the reaction society has to both Draco and Snape, Remus considers them to be in a similar boat to his own, and he can’t actively hate a fellow outcast, though he does pretty fervently dislike Fenrir Greyback.

As a corollary to Remus’s trust issues, once you do get him to trust you, he will do so implicitly, without asking too many questions, and would follow you to Hell and back to keep your trust. He’s honestly one of the best friends anyone could ever hope to have. He’s loyal to the point of not being able to say “no,” he cares to the point that it’s crazy, he’s kind and gentle, he’s selfless, and he’s quick to forgive, unless the transgression was really, truly horrible. For an idea, he was only slow to forgive after Sirius pranked Snape in their sixth year, after Peter threw in his lot with Voldemort, after Snape killed Dumbledore, and after he learned that he wasn’t bitten by an out-of-control werewolf, but, instead, by Greyback. His two biggest failings as a friend are his secretive nature and the fact that, despite having great emotional resilience when it comes to dealing with things like death, lycanthropy, betrayal, and spending two years with the fringe-of-society sort of werewolves, he’s terrified of emotionally intense, personal situations. Honestly, Remus considers himself to be quite an open person, but, when it comes to some things, he’d rather have secrets. For the most part, he considers them to be important secrets – like, not telling everyone when he has to sneak off to deal with other werewolves, or not telling his best mates that he’s a werewolf until Sirius and James figured it out on their own – and, supposedly, keeping them keeps everyone from having to deal with the emotionally intense issues. As to those: Remus is not quite addicted to keeping the peace between everyone for as long as possible, but, so help him, he’d rather everything stay nice and calm, thanks.

Despite all the hardship he’s seen and dealt with, Remus remains an idealist. Part of this comes from his loyalty to Dumbledore, but, ultimately, whatever the causes, he doesn’t want to see the worst of people and, so, tries to ignore them and focus on the good things. He hasn’t always been like this, though; actually, as a teenager, he could be quite fatalistic. Dealing with more adversity (and all the possible ways that Sirius’s infamous prank on Snape could have turned out), however, has made Remus realize that he really can’t afford to assume that things are inescapably bad.

One of the few times when he’s not an idealist is when he deals with himself. Although he has self-confidence enough to help lead the Order and enjoy himself, Remus is quick to be his own worst critic, slow to give himself credit, quicker to underestimate himself (especially when the topic of the control he has over himself in his transformed state comes up), quicker still to guilt himself over something, and slow to accept that, werewolf or not, he’s a good person who deserves to be happy. On a pretty regular basis, Remus finds himself in conflict with what he wants and what he thinks he should do and, more often than not, he’ll go with what he thinks he should do. He holds the most guilt over things involving his closest friends, even though the incidents are all nominally dead and buried: that he couldn’t save James and Lily, thus leading to Harry having a wretched, miserable childhood; that he wasn’t there to help Peter and stop him from going to the Dark Side; that he assumed that Sirius was the spy for Voldemort, sold out Lily and James, killed thirteen people in broad daylight, et cetera; that, for all his attempts, he couldn’t truly help Sirius after he escaped from Azkaban; that he developed feelings for Tonks while still nominally with Sirius; that he eventually had to let Tonks down and barely wanted to believe in the validity of the reasons he gave her. These all taste of betrayal to Remus and he would rather die than consciously betray a friend; the “fact” that he’s done it unconsciously just makes him doubt that he deserves anything good.

But, for all the suffering he’s endured, Remus remains a survivor. He’s learned the hard way that making a fuss about the things he doesn’t like won’t help him, and he strives to be the change he wants to see in the world. When that doesn’t work, as it often doesn’t with werewolf-related legislation and things of that nature, he keeps his dignity, holds his head high, and goes on to keep fighting the good fight. He has more inner strength than he gives himself credit for, and is earnestly motivated by faith in the fact that he’s doing the right thing and that, even if he should die before the Order accomplishes its goals, the causes of good, light, and justice will come out on top eventually. And, maybe, that he’ll make someone’s life better by being in it. He’d rather like that.

And one last thing about his personality that people tend to ignore and/or forget: Remus, contrary to popular belief and despite his usually sober temperament, does enjoy a good bit of fun. After all, you don’t run with James Potter and Sirius Black for your entire school career if you’re a complete and utter stick in the mud. While he considers himself above getting a laugh at someone else’s expense (and would feel guilty as hell if he did, unless the someone was Peeves), he likes cheering people up. That’s another of the many reasons why Remus liked Dumbledore as much as he did: the going got tough, and Albus could still make people laugh. While Remus doesn’t think himself to be on the same level as Dumbledore, he’ll certainly try, inasmuch as someone gets a laugh out of it. Usually, his humor is of the dry, smart-ass persuasion.

Likes: Tonks, libraries, peace and quiet, mint tea, herbal tea, musky smells, calm wilderness, friends, being liked, tasteful practical jokes, Hogwarts, teaching, Honeyduke’s chocolate, helping people out, nice warm beds, warm scarves, bookshops, books in general really, hugs, small animals, young people, public parks, happy families, harmony, The Burrow, the Wolfsbane potion, Tonks
Dislikes: Cigarettes, Grimmauld Place, the Ministry, discrimination (for anyone, for any reason), bigotry (again: for anyone, for any reason), potions and attempting to make them, being touched without first initiating it, the full moon, large dogs, the fact that two of his friends are dead and the other’s gone to the dark side, being alone, his transformations, when young people are rash and unappreciative, his scars, the public backlash against (at various points) against Harry and/or Draco for reasons he considers stupid, the Shrieking Shack, having neither the money to buy Wolfsbane potion nor the aptitude to make it himself, his own perceived past inaction, incredibly sweet things
Hobbies: Reading, writing, helping people, teaching, walking, people watching, cleaning, listening

Parents: John and Catherine Lupin, 69 and deceased, in that order.
Siblings: None.
Relationship with Parents: Well, it’s a little complicated. Remus had a phase, after James and Lily’s deaths, wherein he tried his damndest to distance himself from his family, but he stopped that when his mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. Even with magic, there was really nothing that could help her by the time they made the diagnosis; she died in 1986, and Remus and John have been incredibly close since then. Remus’s one remaining hang-up in any parental relationships, even though he’s mostly gotten over it, is that he was the first-born son and a werewolf, his parents wanted more then one child, and they couldn’t (or wouldn’t) have any because of Remus’s condition.
Relationship with Siblings: N/A.

History: Remus John Lupin was born at St. Mungo’s, on a fine day in March to the happy couple of John and Catherine Lupin, a former Ravenclaw and a former Hufflepuff, school-time sweethearts, and, generally, just a very nice, respectable couple. The sun was shining, John and Catherine’s parents were there, and everyone was quite content with the way things were going. Even Remus, though, to be fair, all he did was squall, sleep, and suckle, eventually. Things sort of continued in that vein for the next six years: the family wasn’t particularly wealthy, but they were quite nicely middle class; John started as a St. Mungo’s-employed mind healer, but went into private practice shortly after his son’s first birthday, and Catherine ran a private Herbology business.

This all stopped being so happy after Remus’s sixth birthday. Though he was still quite content for the time being, unbeknownst to him, John published an important case study in werewolf psychology, based on his conversations with one of his patients. Naturally, this attracted a lot of attention, especially for the claim that, although they are presumed to be bestial in nature and have some traits that are hard to control, werewolves are basically people. This particular claim didn’t sit well with most people: although some considered it a step forward for humanoid magical creatures’ rights, many considered it to be madness. And Fenrir Greyback considered it an offense worthy of punishment, in his usual idiom of biting the offender’s child. Remus’s bite came that summer. Although he was young and it was getting late, he and his maternal (Muggle) grandfather went out for a walk in the moonlight. Greyback, in his idiom, waited, transformed, and attacked the two of them; both were badly injured, but only Remus made it to St. Mungo’s to get healing. His grandfather, unfortunately (or, perhaps, fortunately, all things considered), died from the wounds; Remus, on the other hand, lived to become a werewolf.

Henceforth, Remus was frequently reminded (though John and Catherine didn’t do so intentionally) of just what it meant to be a werewolf. He’d never be able to go to school to learn about using magic, which he’d been looking forward to more than anything. He’d never be able to get a particularly good job, or one that would preserve any sense of dignity. People would reject him if they knew what he was, friends were more than a little unlikely, and, generally speaking, a normal, functioning life was never going to be his. He couldn’t even have siblings, which both he and his parents had wanted, because it was going to be so much work taking care of a werewolf son. The first transformation was the most painful experience of Remus’s short life, and what got to him the worst about it was that his parents couldn’t see him through it because he could hurt them; he just had to suffer through it in the shed behind the house and hope that his father’s charm locks held.

And so it went: every full moon, John took Remus to the shed and locked him in; Remus cried for most of the time leading up to the transformation; then, he transformed, clawed and bit at himself and all the old furniture in the shed; and, in the morning, John took him in and healed him, and Catherine watched over, nursed, and educated him at home. And, all the while, Remus knew that he had to be strong because, in all likelihood, it was never going to get any better. He’d have to transform every night for the rest of his life; every time he did, he’d lose control of himself and could hurt people if not kept away from them; he’d never get to learn how to use magic, which he’d only been looking forward to since time immemorial; and, as far as he knew, he’d always be a burden on his poor parents, who couldn’t even have other kids because of him. …That was where Albus Dumbledore came in.

Shortly after Remus’s eleventh birthday, Hogwarts got into contact with the Lupin family, first as a letter, and then in the form of Dumbledore paying them a personal visit. On said visit, Dumbledore pretty quickly endeared himself to the whole family, particularly Remus, and, for the business end, he explained the provisions and safety measures that were being put in place so Remus could attend Hogwarts like any other young witch or wizard his age. On the evenings of the full moon, Remus was to meet the school matron, Madam Pomfrey, and use a secret tunnel to go to the Shrieking Shack, where he could transform and only be a danger to himself. Pomfrey would then meet him in the morning and heal him over the next few days. If any of the students noticed, he was to make up an explanation, and, to further protect their safety, a magical, attacking tree had been planted over the tunnel, so no one could wander into it and find Remus in his transformed state.

So, Remus went to Hogwarts. He was very unsure of himself at first, but found himself sorted into Gryffindor and latched onto by fellow Gryffindors, James Potter and Sirius Black, who came, it seemed, in a sort of package deal with the enthusiastic, if a bit dim, Peter Pettigrew; when Potter and Black started calling their little group “friends,” Remus had no mind to argue at all. He wanted to be a normal kid, after all, and normal kids had friends. And, besides, James, Sirius, and Peter didn’t know that he was a werewolf, so they couldn’t hate him for it. Once Remus got adjusted to his surroundings, he also found that he got on well with the members of other Houses in his year, and with the girls, for reasons he couldn’t quite figure out. He figured, though, that there was really no point in arguing; if Lily Evans and her friends liked him, then that was fine by him.

The one thing that Remus hadn’t counted on was that his new friends would get concerned about his monthly disappearances and start trying to figure out what was going on. Most everyone bought his various stories about his being ill, or his mother’s being ill, but James, Sirius, and Peter thought differently. Halfway through their second year, they pieced together that Remus had to be a werewolf, and confronted him about it. He tried to keep his head and brush it off, thinking they’d drop the subject, or, if they didn’t, that he’d lose them forever, but they proved him wrong again and, when the truth did come out, they were all very supportive, which just made Remus even more loyal to them. Thenceforth, in between studying (Remus was far from stupid, but took school more seriously than his friends, as it was an unbelievable privilege for him to be there at all) and troublemaking (privilege or not, Remus did love a good bit of fun), Remus was more than grateful to have his friends around; meanwhile, they investigated ways that they could help see Remus through his transformations. The one thing they didn’t do that well was keep their collective mouth shut about everything, although they did have the tact to refer to Remus’s lycanthropy as his “furry little problem,” once James started doing so. This led to the common misconception that Remus owned a badly behaved rabbit, which was followed by the rubbish explanation that his nickname was “Moony” because he had an occasional tendency to be in his own little world.

Throughout everything, there was another, distinctly less savory presence in Remus’s life: Severus Snape. Granted, Snape was mostly a presence in Remus’s life because he, James, and Sirius quickly developed a seemingly irrational hatred for one another, but he was present nevertheless. Despite what his friends thought, Remus was rather of the opinion that, while Snape was certainly prickly and not at all easy to deal with, he was very respectably intelligent and probably a nice person, if one got to know him. …Remus never got to know him. Instead of hating Remus for his lycanthropy, Snape hated Remus for being James and Sirius’s friend, and, you know, being a Gryffindor didn’t help any. Remus didn’t particularly mind, being that he still had friends, but it did take a special sort of coercion to get him to help play practical jokes on Snape. Anyone else in the castle, excepting Lily? Fine, he’d help with that. He even helped prank Slughorn and Dumbledore on various occasions, since Dumbledore thought the jokes were amusing and Slughorn liked Sirius and James well enough to laugh and brush everything off as, “mere adolescent mischief, clearly indicative of creativity, and the perfect end to a lovely day, thank you very much, boys.” But getting him to prank Snape took convincing.

Fifth year signaled that the winds of change were starting to blow. For one thing, Lord Voldemort’s Death Eaters were starting to pick up support, though things weren’t into full on, “kill them all, take over the Wizarding world” mode just yet. For another thing, rather than go the obvious route of making Sirius or James a Prefect for their charisma, Remus found himself sporting a Prefect’s badge. Not that this really allowed him to exercise any control over James and Sirius, but he tried. …Until, around Christmastime, James, Sirius, and Peter finally perfected their Animagus transformations (becoming, respectively, a stag, a rat, and a dog) and began accompanying Remus on his transformations, to keep him from hurting himself. Soon enough, they took to exploring the Hogwarts grounds on full moon nights and, though there were several very nearly fatal incidents, the four of them just laughed about it later. This action on the part of his friends pretty much removed Remus’s thoughts about restraining them too much; after all, they were breaking rules on his account, and he didn’t really want them to stop, and no one actually got hurt, so there was nothing truly visible to complain about. As another result of their late-night marauding, they dubbed their little group, accurately, the Marauders, took on additional nicknames (Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs), and began creating the Marauder’s Map.

Another big change that fifth year signaled for Remus was that, after his photo-based crush on Andromeda, a passing fancy for Lily that went utterly nowhere, and various flirtations and one-time dates with various Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff girls, he found himself rather inexplicably fancying Sirius. It was, almost literally, like being smacked upside the head with a Bat-Bogey Hex, a Jelly-Legs Jinx, and a two-by-four. After all, while Remus wasn’t really going to argue the gender aspect, considering that love was love and, as a werewolf, he had no business rejecting it, Sirius was one of his best mates. And there were no written rules about this, but Remus was fairly certain that one was not supposed to fancy one’s best mates. At any rate, he mostly just sat on the feelings and did nothing with them. They would, he figured, pass like everything else and, in the meantime, he would just have to deal with being better at standing up to James than Sirius. The only real time that this got him into hot water was after the DADA OWL, when Sirius and James decided to pick on Snape; had it just been James, Remus would have said something but, as the case was, he stuck his nose in a book and tried very hard to just ignore everything.

That summer just continued the trend of change. Voldemort’s power continued to grow, and, as if that weren’t enough, Sirius’s situation at home got bad enough that, shortly after his birthday that July, he decided to leave and live with James’s family instead of continuing to tolerate it. Naturally, as soon as James had the opportunity, he sent owls to Remus and Peter, who came over as soon as their parents would let them. Eventually, the “give love to Padfoot party” took a turn for the questionable, with Sirius locking himself in James’s room with a bottle of Firewhiskey and demanding to only talk to Remus. Remus, being Remus, obliged; the conversation wound up delving into the realm of snogging and the phrase, “I love you, Moony.” Naturally, that caught poor Remus quite off-guard, but, again, he didn’t quite feel like arguing. After all, if Sirius loved him and wanted him, and he loved and wanted Sirius, then there wasn’t really a problem, was there? At least, there wasn’t one Remus and Sirius could see.

Then November came around and things got ugly again. Snape rather infamously hated the four Marauders and wanted to see them expelled, a trait that Sirius particularly loathed about him. So, Sirius got it in his head to play a little prank on Snape. Behind everyone else’s back, he told Snape how to get past the Whomping Willow – not the least bit coincidentally on a full moon night. Snape followed Sirius’s advice and could’ve easily gotten killed by the transformed Remus, but James, after finding out, went after Snape and saved him. When Remus heard what had happened, he was nothing short of livid. First off, Sirius could have killed Snape and possibly James with that prank, but it would’ve been Remus who’d taken the brunt of it, who’d have had to go to Azkaban with no hope of ever being let out. Second, and more importantly, Sirius used Remus’s condition, knowing that Remus was sensitive about it and incredibly privileged to even be at Hogwarts in the first place, for something so childish as, “Well, I don’t like Snape and want to punish the slimy git.” That would’ve been bad enough on its own, but bring in the fact that Sirius claimed to love Remus and everything got ten times worse. James was similarly upset with Sirius, and the three of them spent most of sixth year not speaking to the other party (with the parties being Remus-James and Sirius; poor Peter wound up caught in the middle), during which time James started dating Lily Evans and Remus was quite often miserable.

Remus and Sirius did, eventually, make up. On Remus’s birthday. After Sirius utterly demeaned himself in the middle of a corridor and asked for forgiveness. Being only slightly less miserable without a regular, reliable presence of Sirius, Remus forgave him and things picked up where they’d left off. Seventh year was predominantly uneventful, aside from James getting the Head Boy badge and the ever-growing threat of Lord Voldemort, and the four Marauders and Lily all joined the Order of the Phoenix right out of school.

Would that things had stayed as simple as, “Four best mates and Lily fighting for the side of Good.” There were some simple things, of course – James and Lily got married with Sirius as the best man; Remus lived with Sirius in the house that his Uncle Alphard’s money bought; and everyone thought that Peter was forever loyal – but most things weren’t. Remus’s various missions as Order envoy to the werewolves, for instance, required that he maintain secrecy, even from Sirius. And, of course, there were other forces to be reckoned with. Rumors of a spy having infiltrated the Order flew around, and Remus tried his best not to be suspicious of anyone in particular. Dumbledore trusted everyone after all, and Remus trusted Dumbledore’s judgment, so he trusted everyone in the Order. And then, just over a year after they’d had Harry, James and Lily were dead; Peter “died” shortly thereafter; and all the evidence supported a theory that Sirius had been the spy all along. With three of his friends dead (or presumed to be dead) and one in Azkaban for the murder of 13 people, Remus fell back on two older friends, Frank and Alice Longbottom. That didn’t last long either and, as soon as the trial of the Death Eaters who’d tortured Frank and Alice was over with, Remus briefly went home, left most of his (and some of Sirius’s) things there, and then went abroad with his parents’ financial assistance.

By going abroad, Remus thought he could get away from England and all the painful things that had hit him at once. Three of his friends were dead, the man he was trying not to love was responsible and in Azkaban for it, two of his friends had been tortured out of their minds, and the last place he really wanted to be was at his parents’ house, reminded that he didn’t need to feel guilty about what happened. Rationally, he knew that he didn’t need to feel guilty, but he couldn’t help that he did; after all, he wanted to believe that he could have done something to stop what had happened. Even as far away as Russia, he rationalized that he could have done little things – talk more to his friends when he wasn’t with the werewolves, be more suspicious of Sirius even though suspicion didn’t walk hand-in-hand with love, et cetera – and the constant thought of this kept him out of England until April, 1985. At the time, he was living in a French village with an old friend of his father (who served as his translator in exchange for Remus keeping his home clean), when an owl came from home. According to John, Catherine was very ill and going to die soon; not wanting to just let his mother die, Remus returned to England and began caring for her, even after the full moons. She made it another full nine months, which she credited to having Remus around again.

His mother’s death was exactly the smack upside the head that Remus needed. Afterwards, he and his father became incredibly closer, even though Remus insisted on trying to live on his own. He kept a dingy flat in London, while working at Flourish and Blott’s (mostly because Mr. Blott was a friend of the family and would give him allowances, despite the various forms of anti-werewolf legislation, and Remus readily agreed to deal with his various infestations of pests, when they happened, which was often). Life pretty much just happened, with very few incidents of any actual note (even the invention of the Wolfsbane Potion in 1992 didn’t have much importance to Remus, as he couldn’t afford to buy it and figured that he’d likely kill himself if he were to try making it), until the summer of 1993. First, there was the news in the spring that Hagrid had been sent to Azkaban and that Dumbledore had been temporarily removed as Headmaster because of attacks on Hogwarts’s Muggleborn students; Remus took to that with surprise, but the resignation that he couldn’t do anything. Then, there was the news that Sirius escaped from Azkaban, which Remus also resigned himself to trying not to care about; he wanted to do anything he could, but he was sure that this amounted to absolutely nothing. And, finally, Dumbledore asked Remus to come on as the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor; Remus knew that it, no doubt, had to do with Sirius, but he agreed to it anyway.

The year was off to a questionable start from the train ride to school. Although Remus managed to fight a Dementor out of the compartment he was in with Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Neville, he was still unsure about why the Dementors needed to be at Hogwarts. There were the Ministry’s reasons for their presence, of course, but Remus honestly thought that they caused more harm than they did good. And then, of course, there was Snape. Without the buffer of Sirius and James, Remus had to deal with Snape on his own, which he attempted to do by being flippant, facetious, and fun in the face of sour; this tended to work, and earned him the respect and admiration of several students. And then there was Harry to deal with. On the one hand, Remus considered it his duty, after spending so long avoiding all memory of what had happened in 1981, to be something of a father figure, or at least a relatable professor to Harry; on the other, the undeniable similarities between father and son (notably, trouble-making and nighttime wandering, even while a highly competent presumed mass murderer out for Harry’s blood was running wild around Hogwarts) were more than a little frustrating. Remus honestly had no qualms about Harry’s private lessons in the Patronus Charm, but he did wish that Harry would be a little more careful about things.

Finally, the confrontation in the Shrieking Shack came about. Sirius was revealed to be innocent, Peter was revealed to be both alive and the spy all along, Snape was a prat and got knocked out for it – and, at the end of it, Remus got set loose in his transformed state. Nominally, that shouldn’t have been a problem, but he hadn’t taken his Wolfsbane that night and was hypothetically dangerous. He only found out after the fact that Peter had escaped, presumably to find Voldemort again, and that Sirius had just barely escaped the Dementor’s Kiss… and that Snape had “accidentally” let it slip that Dumbledore was employing a werewolf to teach children. Given Hogwarts’s history with Defense professors, Remus hadn’t actually expected to last more than the year, but that didn’t stop him from feeling sad to leave Hogwarts behind.

At his father’s request, Remus stayed at home after leaving Hogwarts, which wound up being beneficial for Order business. He got his way and took up his old post at Flourish and Blott’s, though he mostly worked in the backroom to avoid any hullabaloo over a lycanthropic ex-professor working in the shop. After the events of the 1994-95 school year, Sirius needed a place to stay other than a cave, and, as it was at Dumbledore’s request (and Remus’s, once Dumbledore asked), John let Sirius “lay low at Lupin’s.” Once the Order got started up again, Remus moved into Grimmauld Place, partly not to feel like a burden on his father, and partly to be near the Order at all times, but mostly to take care of Sirius. As they had before, things fell together out of Sirius’s need for human contact and desire for things to be as they had been, and out of Remus’s devotion to taking care of Sirius. The only real problem was that, this time around, Remus loved and cared about Sirius very deeply, but found that being like Sirius’s parent left him feeling questionable about their relationship.

He dealt with it, though. And it wouldn’t have been a problem if not for one, Nymphadora Tonks. Even though she was much younger than him, and Sirius’s cousin, Remus couldn’t help but be attracted to her. Which got quite awkward, once Sirius wised up to the sparks that went flying when Remus and Tonks were sent on assignments together. Being Sirius, he got rather fiercely protective of His Moony and developed a tendency to pout and brood whenever he knew that said Moony and Tonks were off Somewhere together. And, being who he is, Remus not only noticed, but felt horrible about it. First off, he was supposed to be with Sirius, loyal to Sirius, and not looking at anyone else, least of all a member of Sirius’s family, and then there were all the problems he had with being with Tonks – namely that he was close to her mother’s age, he’d had a crush on her mother when he was 13 (which Sirius reminded him of), he had no financial standing unless he burdened his father, and he was a werewolf, ergo highly dangerous.

The Sirius issue stopped being a necessary point soon enough, though, with Bellatrix Lestrange murdering him in the Battle of the Department of Mysteries. During the same battle, Tonks was very badly wounded, and Remus didn’t quite know which incident was harder to deal with. Though that was the case, he knew that the War was on and that both had to be handled. He visited Tonks while she was in St. Mungo’s and went with her and Mad-Eye to meet Harry at King’s Cross after that school year, but, once that was done, Dumbledore had Remus working nigh on full time with the other werewolves. He rather thought that being away from Tonks would help him not be in love with her, but that went exactly the opposite direction of where he wanted. Even while he was in the same company as Fenrir Greyback, notably distrusted because he had the marks of having lived with humans, Remus found himself thinking about Tonks, Tonks, and more Tonks… and Molly Weasley certainly didn’t help with anything.

When the Death Eaters attacked Hogwarts that June, Remus was one of the first Order members to show up and fight, which he didn’t regret… until later, in the Hospital Wing. With Bill having been mangled by Greyback and Fleur taking care of him and sobbing with Molly, Remus was quite content to let the Clan Weasley have emotional control of the situation… Tonks had other ideas. Instead of sliding around the issue, as he wanted to do, Remus was forced to deal with an emotionally wrecked Tonks and her desire to have a relationship with him, even if he was too old, too poor, and too dangerous. He got awkward and tried to avoid the subject… and Molly, Arthur, and McGonagall tried to force him to deal with it. Figuring that it was only fair, Remus escorted Tonks to Dumbledore’s funeral, but distinctly failed to mention that he’d had a breakthrough with the werewolves and was going deep underground with them for an undetermined amount of time. However, Tonks found out and confronted him right as he was leaving Grimmauld Place; since he was unsure as to whether or not he’d return, Remus kissed Tonks, and then left.

He then proceeded to spend two years and three months underground with the werewolves, during which time the transformations were painful, the weather was harsh, the life itself was degrading, and, despite his best efforts, Remus thought about Tonks constantly. Ultimately, he managed to turn a handful of werewolves away from Voldemort, even though very few of them actually came to the Order’s side. His secrecy and tact proved quite useful, but, in the end, he got played by a werewolf set to watch him by Greyback. The members of the pack who hadn’t gotten out already proceeded to turn on Remus, not only chasing him out, but mauling him on the way. Once they’d done enough, Greyback called them off and they left Remus to die; he managed, however, to get a message via Patronus to McGonagall, who had a convoy of Order members find him and get him to St. Mungo’s, just in the nick of time.

Honestly, Remus’s stay at St. Mungo’s would have been shorter, if it weren’t for his furry little problem. The wounds from the other werewolves were bad and numerous enough that they would’ve taken a long time to heal for a non-werewolf, but there were monthly set-backs that kept him in the hospital for much longer than he would have been otherwise. He made it out of St. Mungo’s in mid-January of 2000, and returned both to living at Grimmauld Place and working at Flourish and Blott’s. Though he was ready to get back into the fray, McGonagall thought it best to keep him at the Order’s headquarters for a time, so they could assure that he was really as healed as he could get. He’s been in a semi-managerial position since then, and has been strategically avoiding Tonks, even though he does want to talk to her some time soon about where They stand. Nearly dying and being in the hospital for four months has seriously made him reevaluate his priorities, but then Things Happened to make him reconsider and put his personal life on hold.

After his release from Saint Mungo’s, Remus moved into Number 12 Grimmauld Place for the sheer fact that he was broke and no one could make him pay to live there. Besides, living at Headquarters made everything easier with his attempts at regrouping and running the Order. Remus made it out of the Battle of the Ministry uninjured, but had to deal with watching Antonin Dolohov murder Arthur Weasley, taking care of Percy after he’d watched the same thing, killing Dolohov, and attempting to save as many people as possible. And the full moon was only a few days after the Battle, which did not make his life any easier. For not showing up for “questioning” with Dolores Umbridge, he was labeled a traitor to the Ministry and has been in full-time hiding ever since, still leading the Order in all of their endeavors.



NEW MOON FIRST QUARTER FULL MOON THIRD QUARTER
--- January 2nd January 9th January 16th
January 24th February 1st February 8th February 15th
February 23rd March 3rd March 9th * March 16th
March 25th April 1st April 8th April 15th
April 23rd April 30th May 7th May 15th
May 23rd May 29th June 6th June 14th
June 21st June 28th July 5th July 13th
July 20th July 27th August 4th August 12th
August 19th August 25th September 2nd September 10th
September 17th September 24th October 2nd October 10th
October 16th October 24th November 1st November 8th
November 15th November 22nd November 30th December 7th
December 14th December 22nd December 30th ---


*: The day before his birthday. Say it with me now: "Awwww. D:"


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